New Years means new hurts...learn to love it

Happy New Years to all (in all likelihood) ZERO of you actually reading this. Today we will cover something that everyone thinks about sometime: Morality.

Mirriam-Webster defines Morality as " 1 a : a moral discourse, statement, or lesson b : a literary or other imaginative work teaching a moral lesson
2 a : a doctrine or system of moral conduct b plural : particular moral principles or rules of conduct
3 : conformity to ideals of right human conduct
4 : moral conduct : virtue ".
All of this is, of course, contingent on what exactly the word 'moral' means. Now of course we all have an unconscious understanding of what the word entails, but for the sake of argument lets just formalize it here; "1 a : of or relating to principles of right and wrong in behavior : ethical b : expressing or teaching a conception of right behavior c : conforming to a standard of right behavior d : sanctioned by or operative on one's conscience or ethical judgment e : capable of right and wrong action "
Wowzers! That's a lot of unnecessary words for such a simple concept, huh? I bet if I'd have asked you (or any other layperson for that matter) what Morality is, you'd say something along the lines of "Doing what is Right or Good as opposed to doing Wrong or Evil". Am I wrong?

Anyway, everyone (or at least most of us) tries to be moral. And why shouldn't we? It feels good to be good. It gives us a feeling of greater purpose to give some money or food to the homeless or donate to a charity. It feels as though we are less beholden to our jobs or families, and more in tune with some benign spiritual force. But then, it feels even better to be moral within the boundaries of comfort or convenience doesn't it? When was the last time you literally gave the shirt off of your back? No one empties out the entirety of their wallet to anyone they don't think will pay them back. No one gives everything they have to those in need. Why not? Certainly if there is a god, he would bless yo greatly for your generosity. Or perhaps curse your selfishness. Yes, people give of themselves, but only because it gives them a sense of meaning, and meaning feels good. Let me tell you what feels even better than giving of yourself to others.

Giving of yourself to yourself. Let me let you in on a little secret. It's the reason I sometimes give something to a beggar. Every time you give them something, they feel ashamed. They feel like in return for your help they are having a bit of their dignity and self-respect ripped from them. They may feel like they owe you something, and of course they can't repay it, so that just makes them feel worse. Your morality and your charity dehumanizes them. So why not take that ten-spot you were going to give to some broken down hobo, and instead give it to someone who will actually appreciate it, and you, for your kindness? Get a six-pack and share it with a friend. That way you both get something and no one feels put out or looked down on.

We all do little "random acts of kindness" to convince ourselves that we (as individuals) are inherently good. We also do that because we're taught to, and routines are hard to break. But mostly we're doing moral things for our own peace of mind. Many people believe that if we act moral and other people act moral, we will all be safe. The fact is that this way of thought can get you eff-ing killed. The fact that we are expected to do good and expect that same behavior from others is, in fact, enabling those who would walk all over you to do just that. The mugger in the alley knows many people don't just go about with weapons on them at all times. This is because many people think that everyone not only knows the difference between right and wrong, but also concerns themselves with it. So why the need to arm themselves? And so the brutish thief knows that he can hold you up in relative safety, because you didn't expect anyone to so blatantly disregard what is right and threaten your life to steal your valuables.

So, in a sense morality actually does more to serve the immoral. Ironic, some would say; even surprising. There's a phrase most people learn in their youth that goes 'When someone slaps you across the cheek, turn the other cheek'. Another saying (known as the Golden Rule) is to 'do unto others as you would have them do unto you'. So these two sayings which supposedly encourage virtue, rob people of their self-assertion, and empower those who they call the wicked.

No other creature on earth acts this way, save man. This indicates that said behavior is unnatural. Hence this moral behavior is an abomination. Even in a work environment, if you restrain yourself with moral actions, you are not working to the best of your potential.

Now, dear reader, this is not to make you banish whatever system of morality you follow. But maybe you should follow what you feel, rather than what you are taught you feel. It's tough to tell the difference at first. It requires a lot of inner reflection. You may discover that you like to feel good, or like you've accomplished something. Maybe you need to find or create a system of morality that doesn't make you feel enslaved. I can't tell you what you really need. Only you can do that dear reader. But the next time you perform a "Random Act of Kindness" ask yourself, 'am I being a unique individual, or a tool for someone else's beliefs?'

The answer may shock and horrify you. But they say that the truth hurts.